Okay, seriously... yesterday was tough... I was craving EVERYTHING. But here's the crazy thing. I wasn't even that hungry... My mind was sending my mouth crazy signals. I just wanted to taste food.
TOM is coming soon so I have to be careful when the surges of cravings attack. Generally, it is the only time I have uncontrollable cravings for food.
Here's how bad it was y'all... I went to buy a lotto ticket at my lucky gas station... Well, you know there's so much bad shit up in a convenience store ... I was tempted to buy a bag of chips and a candy bar... Eat it before i got home and throw the packages away at my apartment dumpster... that way my boyfriend, who oh so supportive would never know...
Oh yes, that thought crossed my mind... Sad... So so sad! But I DID NOT do it... Nope! Because another thought crossed my mind that had a stronger feeling down in my spirit.
I thought... If I do this, how would I feel about myself? I can't even put into words the swell of emotion I was feeling at that moment. It was way stronger than the urge to eat some whack ass chips and a candy bar... So I left with my lotto tickets, got in my car, drove home and ate an orange... (of which I couldn't even finish because I got so full so fast.)
I was proud of myself yesterday. I won a battle that I've lost so many times before... But the war is not over and there are several more battles on the road ahead... But today, I'm packed with confidence that I can rise above and actually win!
Now that's a good feeling...
♥ Shaundra
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